Check out the Knight XV's brochure for info about its key features, which may inspire awe, disgust, or both. Here are the essentials:

• the beast takes thousands of hours to build "by hand"
  
• it is exorbitantly expensive
• you can have it possessed by a soul-eating demon for only a few thousand dollars extra.
  

What sets the XV apart from its competitors is that it is not simply retrofitted with armor and bulletproof windows. The XV is built from the ground up as an armored gas hog, and a lamb is slaughtered over its hood before, not after, it has been test-driven. In addition, there's plenty of room in the backseat, Italian pimp masta flex Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi!

But let's get down to brass tacks, or rather double reinforced titanium side-mounted-turret mounts. Why the $*&# would anybody--other than, say, the Egyptian oppressive, U.S.-backed dictator President Hosni Mubarak, or perhaps Russian shirtless, tiger-killing oligarch Prime Minister Vladimir Putin--need this behemoth (other than driving through a zombie herd)? It's a question people often ask about Hummer drivers who live in, say, Fresno, California. In this case, the question drives at the continuing debate about the merits and demerits of the modern military industrial complex, and the indulgence of the few at the expense of the many.

Is it, however, so easy to discard the Knight XV and its bullet-proof vehicle predecessors as weapons of the state against the huddled masses? In a world supporting seven billion people, a small percentage of crazies could number hundreds of thousands. No wonder our leaders--who despite our salient criticisms provide a crucial public service--are scared out of their $*&#ing minds. But it's hard to look at this monstrosity without asking, "Is this necessary?"

You decide.